Starting over!

My dearest, I love as daylight

More morning  all stars

Loving, this is so great, I crave

Chocolate, weigh 198 lbs.

What happened, yes you live in garden

Life with me, land of plenty

Eggs sauteed in mushrooms, onion

Sauce, superlatives, abstractions;

Let me try my apatite, seculent

Stuffed with wild rice, carrots, cabbage.

Mothers and fathers taught

Us both that marvelous design of wight

Loss decades ago you asked me

Why I charged so much left more

Than credit undone, too many purchases

You let me sit in everlasting hell of money

I don’t have, now too much, I have left

All freeze, those computers

Making purchases I can’t afford

With ASCII coded letters, and built

Into little DOS the under-structure

Windows, true understanding founder

Of Microsoft, his billions, taken

From every user, money apple uses

Like Bill Gates his ingeniousness

DOS underscore, theft of all those

Brilliant schemes, once upon a timeless

Timeless time I wrote code in DOS,

Pseudo programs hinting my ability

Computers–little slower, Professor,

Computer with whom I lunched,

Money violated college rules, if I’d

Ponied up, I built my desire, word into

Outstanding GPA, Word Perfect no

More money for learning, Excellent

Writer complete Thesis Why I wrote

Two Books with two completed Softcover

One Hard, Winter from Spring,

Then in Meditations on Gratitude,

Writer with no money both in Kindle,

Apple, Nook, any electronic Format

No one buys poetry, Caloric money,

With more love, yet egg souffle, cheese

Puffs, brownies, methods into varied,

Habits broken, mine in exercises,

Braking less habits, I dig my soil sit,

Into no land, finding exerciser, mine

With machines, I work out with machines;

You mow grass with our electric mower,

Yet let bits and pieces negating my planed

Salads, fumble into tortillas, stuffed with ground

Meat, with hot sauces, now renounce shortening,

White flower, you slyly brought meta taco

Calories, just fries I ate voraciously,  workout

Pretending our bank role, cheap food.

Not together, each other, how can we

Love intervene? How may we lay down

Our cudgels of food, money!?

I have done it, eight bells before death

You at 63, me at 68, we cannot continue,

Must let go of old bones with gravy,

No competition, no more green envy.

We’re through, I’ll walk in morning light.

You’ll sleep in bed without, bedding separate.

I have spirit, meditate humbly pray let go

Oh, dark one, yes we’re free, free at last,

My words prayer!!! Lord come to us! Amen.

Charles Taylor, MFA C2018

Published by elgwyn

I was a University and college writing teacher, now retired, so I write poetry, and essays, mostly free verse poetry. I love writing. Computers, tablets, and smart phones are the norm. When one sees university campuses with students looking at phones while walking to class, one realizes writing can be blogging. I am an ordinary man writing for artistic pleasure writing, and simple taste-- blogs are an answer to high priced self-publishing. Walt Whitman had to print his paper books himself, because in 1855, and 1860 poetry did not sell. It does not sell now unless you have a Pulitzer Prize and even then the poet usually makes a living in other ways than writing. In all ages there have been writers writing out of their own needs, and blogs are an answer to get rid of high cost of self creativity. I am an older man with fewer computer skills than my daughter who has been at computers since she was three, so here I can satisfy my need to write without spending too much on self-published books. All three blogs let me reach an audience missed by books and stand a better chance to reach a wider audience. My two books, Winter from Spring, Meditations on Gratitude, as Kindle books and paperbacks did not reach as many people as I wanted, and blogs can let me avoid the printer. Layout and design is expensive. For me writing is more like the charcoal jottings of preexisting civilization made only for posterity. Blogs face two problems as I see it. They might be submerged into a chaos of too much writing, and they depend on electronic storage. Yet, how's that different from electronic books which must have specialized publication? Paper disintegrates, blogs can be physically stored and organized for posterity in data banks. All organization becomes chaos at some point, but charcoal images on cave walls still exist after the author scribbled eons ago. So what if I reach only a few interested people, but hopefully, readers will reach out to me. Writing is essential for showing the ways of culture before history knows those ways. To record each individual is essential especial for billions of people who need to know enough reading beyond pictures to save a planet. Writing without profit isn't new to me. I'm not seeking to impress the audience. Poetry in general never sells, and personal confessional, and emotional writing exists sometimes like journal writings only for the author. At least here is my hope for wider audiences. My writing is personal and informal, but my writing expresses some serious ideas like the writing of contemporary writers to rise above chaos in my own simple way, above self-absorption, a meditation, the simple writing of an ordinary man. I hope to find my own way out of my own chaos and make my record stand alone if even in electrons. Though I hope never to express nightmare in my poetry, fiction, or essays, some serious considerations are important to me after centuries of mechanized nightmare. The next decade is probably of the same failure in our world. This decade looks to be another time of diminished individuals and the next as well. We all wish peace and hope will become normal. It looks like if hope reaches each individual, not governments there is satisfaction in making means of writing available to many. My hope is for each human being to give their own expression out of the abyss. If humankind is to survive in any common way, we must each be able to express maturity and take responsibility in something beyond self. Electronic media offers people these possibilities so long as computers can store individual lives. Here people can freely see what I write and what others write. Though I hold an MFA in creative writing my simple vision never found a wide audience. I was disappointed about this earlier in my life, but now it's just what one expects of such degrees. I found happiness in family and especially in love of my wife and daughter. Writing can be more than a pastime now that I'm older. I approach seven decades living with some disappointing times, and some satisfying times. I'm like most people, and I've been married more than 37 years, and we sent a successful daughter into the world. We happily live in a country where even the poorest have food. Often as a young man when I traveled for nearly one year through Europe, where does a culture begin to feed and house so many people, and how do all these people live in harmony since World War II? Maybe it's been a question of survival. Writers can hold a little corner with blogging, blogging for harmony and peace. This is my hope. This is my question.

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